Sometimes the faintest goodbyes are
the ones heard the loudest. The subtle brushes with history the most painful
and the vaguest memories the most vivid. How does one prepare to let go of what
was never truly grasped. The hope of reconciliation pried from a weak grip that
could never truly hold on to the past. I was reminded of this today when a
faint dream became more of a reality. I don’t know if the dream was truly a
precursor to what reality confirmed today. I would hope so but reality planted
its seeds months ago. I believe that maybe this seed had just received enough
nourishment, and in turn its roots sprouted deep into my subconscious.
Never the less alignment of my
dream with today’s discoveries is all too perfect. As perfect as an arrow or
gunshot ever was when it ricocheted off its unintended target to its main focus.
I supposed I could weep in this discovery; however weeping is not what is
needed. Acceptance is what is needed. For not to accept this reality would only
prolong the nightmare of denial. So I accept this today. I embrace the change
of separation and I let all emotions attached with that change precipitate upon
me. Hopefully this rain will be a healing rain. Maybe it will be a cleansing rain?
If neither then let rain simply reign.
" If rain drowned me in emotions over again and again. I pray it always rains so that my swimming would not be in vain." - Kevin Burns Jr.
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