Onward, forward, and beyond...

      It is a hard thing to accept what you feel like is the end of a "dream that could be". But sometimes we must do this in order to see the reality of what is to come. Is it enough to continue to dance with the ghosts of our past? Only pacifying our true needs in pursuit of our already decaying archaic desires. 

      I challenge you to truly seek God and his plan for your life, casting aside the backup plans you have just in case you don't like where God is taking you. For life begat life. "Trust in the Lord, with all your heart and lean not on your own understandings. But in all your ways acknowledge him and he shall direct your path." 

Proverbs 3:5-6 

Hmmm...

I'm not a confirmed theologian and often I ponder upon the same truths of God's word as you may. I'm often caught in the cycle of  putting parables, scriptures and thoughts through constant digestion over and over again. But sometimes the smallest inklings of revelation can drop upon the canvas of your mind. My disclaimer; this is not an anti-theoretical, empirical attempt at a conclusive truth.  But isn't it interesting that Jesus and Jonah were both on a boat sleeping through a storm? When Jonah was awaken to help with the storm he ultimately could only get peace by being swallowed by the circumstances where as Jesus spoke and commanded the circumstances to stop. Now at the very simplest interpretation it seems very important who you run to during your storms. I mean it wasn't as if during Jonah's experiences the shipmates weren't praying to their various Gods. However during the disciples experience, God happened to be right there with them. 

Falling in love, really???

   It is quite interesting that we use the phrase, “falling in love” as if “love” was a hole in the ground or some open void out in the prairie that we happen to stumble into. No wonder we ask why do you love me? To which some might reply, “Oh, you’re beautiful or handsome”, “you’re nice” or maybe “you and me are compatible” (that’s a whole another subject in itself). If this is true then what did Jesus trip over in order to fall in love with me; my sins? But who would trip over lying, cheating, lustfulness, greed, etcetera and stay in that hole after tripping in it? I know I would be screaming, “Get me out of here, I’ve happen to have fallen in love”.

    However, Biblical love is not deemed some happenstance or involuntary emotion that you have no control over but rather something intentional. “For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten Son that whosoever believeth in Him should not parish”.[1] Gave is the key word there, in order to give something you have to intentional make a decision to give it away. If you go with the proposition that you fall in love, then it is more of an accident or something that was taken away from you. Thus giving credence to the idea that, “you stole my heart”. “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”[2] If love is all of those things, then love is a choice that we make. If God is love[3], and his actions toward us is the epitome of the example of love then we know that it is a choice to love. 

    So love is represented in our actions versus our euphoric feelings. So then we don’t fall in love rather we choose to love someone. So the true question is why have you chosen to be patient with me, or kind to me? Why do you suffer with me, or don’t get angry with me easily? To which your reply can be, “because you look good”. I’m just joking, but you can get the example of what I’m trying to say. So now when I think of why Jesus loves me, I think of this sobering idea. The idea is that Jesus didn’t ‘fall’ in love with me. Rather he chose to love me. He loved me by seeing my situation and deciding to get in the hole with me to show me the way out, instead of simply telling me how much he loved me.  

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[1] John 3:16 (Holy Bible)

[2] 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (Holy Bible)

[3] 1 John 4:16 (Holy Bible)

Bucket of Tears

If a bucket of tears mopped the floors of our tomorrow, 

Could we steal happiness from today,

So our future selves could borrow?

Will those actions torment us like the running of the bulls?

Running for temporary satisfaction. 

The unmasking our thoughts reveal a gouging transaction. 

If the horns of our hearts somehow bring us to be,  

Would the reflection of our future be clear enough to see? 

A bucket of tears could mop the floor of our tomorrows, 

Will you still spend it with me? 

Touch

One of the most powerful senses is the sense of touch. To feel the contact of another person enter your realm through touch can be exhilarating or alarming. For example holding hands is one of the most basic and intimate practices of touch. Think about it, lovers hold hands as they walk idly through evening sessions talking for hours. Friends greet each other with a signature handshake unbeknownst to any outsider. Spouses grip each other's hands as they brace the woman through child birth. And though formal, a handshake introduces you to a new employer or constituent. 

 

Touch has to be one of the most interdependent senses we employ. With these touches we impress ourselves physically into someone else's lives. Touch can also be volatile, like when someone physically abuses someone, when a child touches a hot flame, or unwelcomed fingers that probe unwelcomed places. If physical touch has the ability to leave such great impressions on our lives, how much more does emotional touch intimately dive into the seas of our souls.

 

If we are cautious to be ever so careful in a physical plane where we can see the damage or elation by touch. Shouldn't we be even more careful with emotional touch, where we are not always able to see the repercussions of our actions? I pray that you touch each other's lives in a way that doesn't damage, but rather fosters healing. A way that doesn't gain intimacy through dissimulation but fosters an atmosphere of welcome through honest intentions. Touch. 

 

 

 

 

It's not time to quit!

Don't quit. Contrary to what many people say it is not always easy to quit. Some aspirations are like seeds that have yet to germinate because they lack the proper environment to sprout and flourish. But you never know when that seed will be sown into good ground. It is difficult to believe in what is not seen with the natural eye. But if you had to wait for that optical assurance then progression would inch along in very small increments. Do not let the sharp reminder edging you to keep going become a dull, numbing pain that you learn to ignore. Don't quit! 

Parent Like

I was praying for God to reveal to me who he was. What his personality was like etc. I had a dream, where I came home to my room and it was all changed around. The bed was smaller and things were missing like a dresser and something I used to keep money in. When I saw my mom I started complaining, “What did you do to my room, where my dresser, and my bed is small? Where is my stuff?” She looked at me and didn’t say anything at first but I knew by her look that I had done wrong. I can tell she was disappointed by me and how I was acting. She then started to explain to me what she did, she said you didn’t even ask what happened. You just started complaining”. Then she explained how she moved things around for the betterment of the family, and how she had been working on it all morning. 

She told me she switched my room with my brother. She also said that my bed and dresser was in my new room. She moved my money to a new holding place in her room because she had a better method of holding it. I still wanted to complain, but by then I started to feel a little ashamed. I think I said something about the bed being too small for my brother. But then I had this pseudo conscious unconscious experience and realized it was a setting in my past so my brother was smaller. I realized how everything she did was for the betterment of the family and not just me. In fact she did do something for me I just didn’t realize it because I was upset things weren’t how I left them. Anyway, I started to think is God like this, doing things that are for the betterment of the whole family? I thought that sometimes we don’t understand God’s thinking but instead of asking or trying to find out we just complain. In all actuality it was my mother, so she had every right to move everything in that house.  After all she and my father paid for it. I was just able to use it because I was their child.